Wasting Time

...For me is being idle and being idle means I am becoming one of the Devil's spawn. 'Idle hands are the Devil's workshop'

I am working towards that goal. However, I am still far from that level and the Devil is NOT a slacker as all humans might presume?! But one thing remains true...

The Devil is Evil

A short something I wrote earlier today during Filipino discussions. From what I can sense/observe my fellows don't like him nor do they underestimate him. But to me he is one of the many forces that makes me think for myself :]

And I don't care about going to school!!!

Chapter 2

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If only I was American it could've been different. If only I lived somewhere else not in this confusing country called 'Philippines'. I could say many foreigners are beguiled by this exquisite yet candid beauty that men call 'Filipinas' they live as they are told and work hard for their children's and families food. But they never ask anything in return for they know that such gratefulness could only be given back to their ever supporting god called 'Sacred Heart'

I was born on that day and well learned it later now...Right now I am in church tagging along side my pious mother as she prays fervently to these saints statues to have her wishes and sorrow be answered in the most significant albeit random way. And like all god-given children we are to pray obediently to our master and pray our mastered prays, In my school we we're forced as part of the curriculum to take part religiously to our christian living activities ( to me it seemed like an ordinary Jesus-did-this-and-you-better-not-forget-that subject) everyone is ecstatic since their friends are near and they would change seats in order to listen to anothers stories. I, on the other hand sat there plainly bored as ever yet attentively listening to these parrots of christ.

But what made me go there was for the 'Brothers' yes those seminarians they're such a waste of good looking, down to earth, happy go luck men! Whilst we stuck with this sex starved version of a man or boys...

Anyways, I stood there brooding once again while shyly looking around for some cute, mysterious and unique faces of both young and old. You see I had a fetish for somethings and these fetishes made me happy...I adore at looking at people trying to get a glimpse inside their eyes and read their souls like an open book...It was a habit of mine to read a person's face and understand what they meant I was fully aware that I was born accursed as a girl and no doubt would lose an important part of myself if I wasn't careful enough.

There they are swarming around this dimly litted church with black bats hanging around the ceilings as their nest. This church where I always walked passed and never bothered with the church that I've always run to whenever I didn't want to listen to the gospels...this church where my supposed father in heaven reigns over. The almighty powerful church of God and he who pisses God off crawls back to him in no time.

I'm serious! I'm serious! I'm serious!

"Are you done yet, Agnes?" I asked in a whispered tone while I stood beside her ignoring the old wooden sculp of the Mother of Regla. "Are you done yet?"

Ignoringly she continued her prayers the next minute she walked away from that point to go across the room and said her farewell to all the statues then back to me, and without saying a word grabs my hand and we dashed for the sacred room. I love that room it was the best place to sleep in without the guards annoying us even though it was prayer room people could lift their burdens in sleep while praying to the Sacred Heart.

As always we took those square cushions and placed ourselves near the cold marble walls. Mother continued praying whilst I started to imagine.

'Damn...wonder when she's done...man am I fat? (groan) geez what's with this skirt eww those guys we're looking at my legs dumb fucks! shit! shit! no cursing in the head! no cursing in the head! Ah geez sorry dad couldn't help it!'

Okay, I was quite the oddball I loved clothes but it didnt help that people stare at me as a weirdo, an sex object, or another wannabe but who knows I never understood other people anyway. I was dressed to kill that day even though we were always just going to church I could've settle for less but I have no idea why I keep on dressing up like one of those J-poppers on the internet it made me no less adorable or at worst just a damn tease to old men.

My body is nothing to boast about it is not perfect nor is it horrendous. It is as it is and have always been my body even if Time had ravage my body in its mercilessly whoring for change and stagnation. But one thing Time couldn't destroy was my mind I was glad that change was merciful and through my own faults seek wisdom in them through the eyes of my mind and silence.

I felt my mother reached for me cause she abruptly stood and finally broke the spell of wisdom fuelling my mind with pictures. I trotted behind like a good girl and wore my footwear as it is on my foot and met her outside the doors of this sacred place and as we walked past it to visit another important of this church I never failed to see those atheistic asians with their camera's and take footage inside our church.

Sometimes I feel that their smugness for having too much money and time to waste anywhere they pleased would always lead them into suicide someday. I wished ever so much that God would strike down those who gave into his side only for it to be a laughing stock for those who had not crossed to see...I hated them very much...

We we're finally going home I felt relieved and happy to be go back home. I've always been afraid of the sun going down it always meant going home and living here was different because I had to catch a ride quickly so I wouldnt be stuck in a traffic jam and this country always had them ever since the jeeps popularity increased and by the time I was around adulthood they had slowly evolved into a bad boy persona every driver wants to be, in the streets the cars we're remodeled and its engines we're change to suit the taste of these air devilish drivers.

The streets we're dark the jeep we took had a few passengers so the fresh street city air greeted me through the jeeps opened windows...Thick air slicing through our skins with the dirt they carried through since yesterday had slowly accumulated itself. Everything seemed normal but I knew there was something going on between mother and daughter. Looking at my mother's aged face I can sense the hardships she had had all her life they we're signs that she was almost sick of life and yet when I try to peer through her dark brown eyes they tell me that she understood everything was meant to be. I envied her. I wanted to grow up so much that I would do anything I want after this old woman let's go of me I can do everything I want and no one will ever tell me what to do...once I grow old

oh the muses!!!!!!!!!!

Oh! The debonaire!

Life have been simple for me. KKK do you know what that stands for? In my dialect it's Kaon, Katug, Kalibang!!! (Eat, Sleep, Shit.) Do you know what I hate the most? EVERYTHING. Why? because I said so...Okay, maybe not everything but I've always had this feeling of hate/love relationship with everyone and everything.

'People die'

My mantra, If you don't believe then you suck!

My life as I said is simple...Live life and then do what you can do with it KKK was the easy thing to say but then I have to explain it deeply for you. DEAR.AUDIENCE.
I am an open person---to myself and to the people----way too open. People might mistake my mind as an hell hole for the thrash I've consumed over the years from watching tv and southpark ( Southpark rocks you don't! ) This life could've continue like it had always been...Me failing school, getting behind classes, dream about on my chair, doodle shit on paper, and having no friends. That was the best part no friends it made me feel lonely but strong inside because I was doing stuff I like without another idiot hanging around me alot and talking about their home, houses, and stuff they've already thrown away...yeah it could be I was cynical too but I was young then and had peanuts for brain and still even now.

Being unfriendly was a trademark it made me like the j-princess of darkness cause I had a strong japanese features as they say and straight hair with streaks of perfect golden strands. It was the original plan my mom had cooked up as she experimented with dye to see how good it would look on her and her daughter was a perfect model. I , of course was reluctant and stupid enough to have fallen for her smoothering anger on me. So I grew like a popular princess on our street then as I reached my pre-teen years mom grimaced as she saw traces of baby fats undiminising from behind, side, front and almost every where---I was fat---end of story.

So I lost that golden popularity amongst my family and colleagues, but even if that happened I was never happy but glad because I was sick of being tag as a cute little girl ripped out from the pages and films of popular books and characters. I hated that but I never knew at once. Anger must've blinded me.

Now sitting in front of this computer I angst in glee as it is my hobby to angst all out without understanding what I've just typed.

My life I can say is the most boring of all and I like it that way with a hint of wishfulness that someday I'd get a man to have fun with and if I'm bored to kick around at.

HG: Part 1

Once upon a time there lived a rich business man who dealt with the underground businesses he had three children the oldest had left without notice leaving him with the compulsive princess and the mysterious prince respectively kana and yuu.

One day he got a call from his long time pal overseas.

"Hey! Richard how's it goin?"

"Bad."

"why bad?"

"my eldest left me to watch the rest."

"oh? Where's your wife?"

"dead."

"oh, my bad. Well you can throw em out of the house just sustain them with a monthly allowance then they won't depend on you..."

"That's a great idea but where would I throw them?"

"shinjuku?"

"Great idea!"

So after that------------------------------


"Daddy why are we inside this dark limousine going nowhere?"

"to bring you nowhere dear."

'His throwing us out stupid...'

"Daddy why is the street soooo bright and colorful is there a festival?"

"Those are night clubs dear their there when you need them or if you feel like it."

'Why Shinjuku this place is full of retards!'

"Daddy why are we stopping here? ah! daddy why are you pushing us out?! DAAAADDDY!!! DON'T LEAVE US!!! I DON'T KNOW THE WAY BACK HOME!!!"

"STOP YELLIN ALREADY SHEESH!!!"

"HUH? OOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!! YUU!!! Daddy left us just like big sis did when she-she-"

"There, there kana we'll get home...eventually"

"HUH?! WHY EVENTUALLY!!! THIS IS LIKE THAT HANSEL AND GRETEL STORY AND THEN WE'RE GONNA HITCH ON SOME OLD TRANS HAG!!!"

"SHUT UP K!!!"

"sorry..."

"I've got a plan if we stick by it we'll survive...eventually"

"-__- so what's the catch?"

"See this?"

"ooooh shiny!! yeh? it's a credit card"

"yup daddy's family card...somehow he magically slip it in my side pockets while kicking us out of the car..."

"HUH?! NO WAI!!"

"you figured it out already! I'm impressed...(not!) HEY KANA!!!"

"With this we can buy something to eat----"

"no! with this we can get ourselves a place at a five star hotel for awhile!"

"Oh is that how it is?

"yeh but let's get some grub I'm starvin like hell..."

"ah! niichan wait for me! Their's creepy pedo's about!!!"

meanwhile, the rich business man had shed crocodile tears to his co-partners condoling him about his sad family life and that theirs werent any better over beer and pole dancing women at a sleezy expensive club at the far side of Tokyo.

All night long, the two siblings we're enjoying their live's in a city that never sleeps Kana who didn't realized how impulsive she was at buying drag yuu all over places that he soon gave no intention of ever returning again.

"oh! Oh! Yuu dear try this one on it looks cool on you! yuu? yuu? AH!! YUU!!"

Yuu was stalled by two voluptous women who we're obviously unmarried and old. One had red hair the other had golden with orange streaks.

curiously she hid behind a post straining her hearing sense...

"Your sooooo cute!" Red hair " And skin so soft!"

"You must be a million dollar baby" Goldie

'Why's he not doing anything! Yuu becareful!'

Then the redie came close to his ear and whispered something. Yuu smirked sheepishly which confused his sister a lot.

'yuu wouldnt! No Kana must not think green! not green! oh no the green!!!'

her mind would be undeniably green and so her face was flushed with the green thoughts sizzling in her brain.

"hmph." he chuckled. " I don't play with old plastic barbie dolls. se'ya."

Surprisingly the two women's face turned red with fury the goldie suddenly lift her arm wanting to slap the brat's face but---

"I'll scream that I'm being harassed by two old women who're wanted by the police."

"what?!" Reddie turned to Goldie. "HAh! We're no criminals!"

"Oh,really?" Yuu turned his back on them and walked away. " Then what about that" he pointed outside towards the giant tv that screened the two women's faces.

"SHIT!" Goldie muttered. " Red rose let's go we don't even play with little kids anyway!"

"shuddap that was your idea you manslut. I just tagged along hmph!"

"DOn't start with me you fucki----"

As the prince left the two foul mouthed women, looking really cool by relaxing his hands inside his pockets,his sister the princess came to him with a worried look.

"what's with that face kana-chan doesn't suit you."

"You---"

Suddenly kana gave him her infamous death hug over his neck which caused him to suffocate for his dear life.

"You embizzle why we're you hanging out with those two and not me! stupid! baka! doo-doo head!!!"

"yeesh! Kana stop it! if I didn't they'd hunt us down like dogs and we'd be in trouble! Dad will be!"

"huh why?"

"I'll tell you later when we get to the hotel,k? Right now I just want to go home."

"Okey! Just let me get my shopping bags tee-hee"

"2 minutes and we're leaving!"

"ooookay!!!"


The prince went to find a seat between commoners while he waited patiently for his beloved sister. He sighed taking a glimpse at his watch it said 7:40.

'one hour and 10 minutes before supper then bed time...geez kana's hard to put to bed especially their'll be tv near her...oh gawd! where's that idiot anyway?'

"2 minutes has passed what's holding her up?"

In search of------

"KANA! KANA! WHERE ARE YOU! KAAAAAAAAAANAAAAAAA!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!"

Poor prince yuu what has happened to his dearly beloved sister and it's almost bed time!!!


"God! I gotta know where she is before this part 1 end!!!"